The Ramblings Of A Madman...
Kain McBride

walking through the streets... finding holes in time... crouching over death... hiding all the time... running from the law... leading them to traps... running for your life... or just for fun mayhaps... i think i'll catch the train... or maybe take a bus... i'm running from nothing... hiding in the moss... i think there's someone here... looking down on me... always working hard... never wanting to see... i think i found the answer... to see, oh no to hear... i think i'll have a shower... but first i'll have a beer... i want to get real drunk... i want to find my self... i want to be in space... i want to hurt myself... i think i found a ryme... i don't know where it is... but it's not lost no more... it's somewhere, here it is... i'm looking through the trees... they're laughing down on me... maybe somewhere there... they'll stop and then they'll see... and something out in space... is looking for it's home... it doesn't know where it is... but it's thinking whilest i rome... the end is surely near... but near it is so far... for nothing's ever clear... not clear as the star... i think i found the truth... it's burried under sand... i was walking down the beach... when i found it's hand... i pulled it from the ground... and brushed it clean from dirt... i stood it on it's feet.. the truth is such a jerk... i'm running from the truth... he's such an ass you know... i was only trying to help... but he wants to kill me now... and all i need is time... time to find my way out... nothing's ever lost... when everything is found... the world is so small... i put it in my pocket... the moon is nothing more... than a ball of pocket lint... she's looking in my eyes... and there's nothing there... it's void of life you see... but that doesn't matter... there's nothing in the rain... but something definatly there... it's scratching at my eyes... 'cause i can't see it's here... but nothing ever cared... not in this world of pain... where life it is so scared... and hiding in the rain... i want to find the end... but no one ever does... the end it is the start... the start of what's become... nothing's ever here... everything instead... i miss the nothing now... i'll find it, it is said... ... ...

hmmmmm... i haven't written anything like this in a while... so... here she be...

Meaningless Gibberish...
Kain McBride
walking through the clouds...
falling from the ground...
laughing at the sky...
landing as i die...

nothing's ever clear...
everything is blurred...
i want to find the end...
but it's always, further...

i'm swimming in the lake...
and someone's pouring gas...
he's playing with a match...
and now the lake's on fire...

i'm swimming under flames...
and lifting my head high...
i'm on fire but it's not hot...
i can't stop to wonder why...

the grass is calling me...
to go roll on the ground...
putting out the flames...
not dumb as it sounds...

the grass is laughing now...
laughing with the trees...
they all think it's a joke...
skin burning from my knees...

the trees, they are so mean...
they like to watch my pain...
they like to laugh at me...
they think that i'm insane...

i'm yelling at the trees...
yelling with no sound...
they're yelling back at me...
through the hollow ground...

there's something over there...
rustling in the grass...
i think it'll run away...
but it's not moving very fast...

hey look it's stocking me...
until i'm all alone...
when everyone is gone...
then what will it do?

i can't find where it starts...
i can't see where it ends...
it's somewhere out in space...
or is it just pretend?

the world's full of pain...
it's stained on broken glass...
my blood spills, that's the stain...
so have a great life lass...

damn that was annoying...
ok, i just got my computer back... it's been acting up lately... and, then the keyboard died... lol... so i brought it in to the shop to get the keyboard fixed, and unfortunately for me... the warenty had expired 4 days before... :( so... the guy at the shop was going to honner the warenty anyway, because of how close it was... but, if they couldn't fix it right away, he'd have to send it back to the manufacturer... and they might not have honnered it... which'd suck... anyway... they didn't start working on it for 36 hours... which was apparently good, 'cause it might have just been too hot or somethin... 'cause when he started it up, it worked... which was strange, because for me it wouldn't work in windows, in dos, anywhere... it was fried!!! so... i got my laptop back, and the bill was 0 dollars, which kicks ass... :)
anyway... since then, i've formatted, installed windows 2000 (which came with my laptop, so it should probably have been on there anyway...) and started reinstalling software... i don't have everything running yet, but, that's ok...
hmmm... about the blog... what do i write... i don't know if anyone's answered that yet, 'cause i haven't been here in a while, but... we'll see... it think i'm going to go back to just messed up stuff, 'cause the other things that i'd write are... well... pattent pending... ;) so... yeah...
hmmm... but, first... a little about me... i don't know if i've already written this, 'cause i have a very bad memory... i was in a car accident which sort of sealed that fate... but, i hope i can improve upon my memory over time... hmmmmm... i just watched Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas... damn that was a good movie... if you've never been into drugs... good for you... lol... but, watch this movie... watch it intently... pay attention to everything, not the individual things... just listen, watch... and hear everything... by the end of the movie... you should feel a little odd... a little messed up... almost high... if you have been into drugs in the past... you'll remember lots of things you thought you'd forgotten forever... :)
personally, when i watched it... (both times, i watched it twice in the last month or so) i changed a bit... getting more gittery... kinda strange really... no eye movement anymore... i'd turn my head for everything... not slowly... but, quickly, like when your eyes do move... and my thoughts started to go back to the way they used to be... the way i used to think... damn i miss that... :) so... enjoy the movie... it's a definate must rent... also, i suggest watching... in the mouth of madness... it might be hard to find, but it was a really good movie... apparently it's a horror movie, i didn't know until recently... i just thought it was a normal movie, couldn't see any reason to be scared of anything... but, some people do i guess... i've watched this movie with lots of different people, some of them were scared... others were not... i'm not going to be sexist about it, but all the women i've watched it with knew it was a horror movie fairly close to the beginning... or, at least they showed signs of being scared... which was odd... but, that's ok... however, there are also guys who've watched it that i know who knew it was a horror movie... maybe it's just me... maybe when i watch things like that i don't see anything scary... i just like what i see, and find the story facinating... anyway... it's a horror movie, but a really good one (story i mean, not one of those lame ass ones) so... it's also a must rent... :) hmmm... 12 monkeys was a good movie too... especially when you're a little messed up to begin with... ;) but, yeah... enjoy this movie review... if you've seen one of these movies and not the others, but didn't like that one, they're all different completely... so watch the others...
i'm going to write something else a little later i think... but for now... this is it...

ok, so i did a freak test... just out of curriosity...


Are you a freak? by krysten

prolly good enough for the night... i'm too damn tired to be writin anything... later people...

Damn i'm tired... ok, i haven't been around for a while, i went to visit my cousin in ottawa, so... if you're a little upset that i haven't updated, sorry, but i don't think you are... anyway... what to say... ottawa on canada day... it was crowded... maybe not to everyone, but to me it sure as hell was... i come from a very small town, and there was easily 200 times the population of my home town on the street at any given moment that night, so... yeah, i found it pretty cramped... the fireworks... i wasn't all that impressed... not that a lot of people weren't... i remember some kid looking and yelling... "OH MY GOD!!! LOOK AT THE RED ONE!!!" and about too minutes later he was like... "OH OH OH!!!! PINK!!! COool... Pink... yeah... pink..." sp. he had a good time, but i have no idea who the hell it was... anyway... that was ottawa... went to a few places while i was there, had a good time, but it was hot as hell there i tell ya...
i'm thinking about getting back into the poetry thing every once and a while, but i'm not sure what to write right now, it's gotta be the heat that's obstucting my creative writing abilities (always blame that which cannot defend itself... not because it's not there, but because it is not animated, humanoid, or living...) lol... that's some bad advice if i ever gave some.. but, yeah... that's it... i'm rambling and talking about nothing... i can't even see... eyes are closed... so if i miade a bunch of typo's... tell me, maybe i'll go back and fix them sometime...
thanks for the help...
PS: i'm still waiting for someone to tell me what they want to read here... i could just talk about whatever, but... well, i guess that's your choice...
later